People seem to love free stuff, even if it’s rubbish free stuff like Podcasts.

Every now and then (seeing as they’re free) I try and get into a podcast channel.  Plenty of people seem to be into them, like it’s a part of their weekly routine.

I’m convinced I’m missing out on something great that I’ve yet to realise, like when I first discovered Bran Flakes or coffee.

Last week I tried the Guardian’s football podcast.  After all, I love football and I read the Guardian, so what could go wrong?  

Well, quite a lot it seems.  The host at least was just about bearable.  He seemed nice enough and well spoken, and came across like a young and bright Oxford University type who decided a career in football journalism was more interesting than law.

One of the guests however was absolutely awful. I couldn’t work out if he was half dead or half asleep.  Not only that but his microphone (he was dialing in from home) had an awful echo to it like he was calling from a damp cave.  I mean seriously, if I was going to be doing a podcast for the Guardian then a decent microphone from Amazon would be my first priority.

The issue with most channels is that they take ages to get going.  Imagine watching a film with 20 minutes of intro credits, or your car engine wanting 10 minutes to warm up before you can move. Podcasts are exactly the same. Without fail the host will spend a large amount of time introducing themselves, followed by an even longer amount of time introducing their guests, and then they play some dreadful intro music, followed by “this channel is brought to you by”.

Then they laugh and joke a bit with each other, like a few mates on some reunion. Everybody just acts like a group of stoners in their bedroom reminiscing about some random event that has nothing to do with the title of the podcast.  

I’m sure that somewhere out there is a podcast for me, full of interesting content spoken by people who are not annoying, who don’t dilly dally around and who understand the fine line between loving the sound of your own voice and realising that nobody else loves the sound of your own voice.

But until that day comes, I will just have to presume that podcast listeners have bad taste.